I Don't Know How To Love Him
by Yuzu
Summary: MegumixSano fic. [one-shot]


**Disclaimer:** The song belongs to Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice. Anything else you might recognise belongs to Nubishiro Watsuki-sensei and some companies I can't name... There, now you can't sue me! BWAHAHAHAHA!

I Don't Know How to Love Him  
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Megumi sighed. It had been a long day. Kaoru and Kenshin had just been over to check that nothing was wrong with their unborn baby. They'd left with good news, or at least Megumi thought it was good news. Kenshin and Kaoru looked happy, tired or confused. She really didn't know how to judge their facial expressions. But, she sighed again, to know you're having twins is always a surprise.  
As Megumi started to clean the clinic for the day, there was a knock on the door. She knew who it was. Who else could it be?  
Putting the broom down, she straightened her kimono before she when to unlock the door. There he was, standing in the pooring rain, grinning a bit uncertain at her. She could see he'd been in a fight. He was bleeding from a cut on his forehead and surely in his palm too, even if she couldn't see it. She just knew.  
"Hi." He said.

_I don't know how to love him  
What to do, how to move him  
I've been changed, yes, really changed  
In these past few days  
When I've seen myself  
I've seemed like someone else_

"A fight, I expect." She said, dragging him into the warmt. "Hai." She motioned him to sit down while she went to get bandages. "You won?" She asked when she'd gotten back. "Hai." Kneeling beside him, she examined the cut on his forhead. Nothing deep, just a superficial cut. She moved down to his hand and saw that his scar had been torn up. She remembered that night two years ago. She was about to kill herself. He saved her, getting his scar.  
That was when he started to penetrate her impassive soul, getting deeper than her heart. God, it was irritating. He'd gotten under her skin. She'd told herself over and over again that she loved Kenshin. But when he'd married Kaoru, she didn't feel heartbroken. Just.... dissapointed and confused. Now Sanosuke was the one who held a special place in her heart. And she couldn't stand it. 

_I don't know how to take this  
I don't see why he moves me  
He's a man, he's just a man  
And I've had so many men before  
In very many ways  
He's just one more_

She'd started to bandage his hand, when she felt his breath in her hair. "What did you just do?" She asked, standing up rather fast. "Did you-" But that was all she was able to say before she fell. She's gotten up to fast. But she never hit the floor. Instead, she felt arms catching her. Strong arms.  
"Did you-" She tried again. "smell my hair?" A little color crept up his face, making his cheeks go a slight shade of pink. "Nani? Iie." He said, trying to brush it off. "Don't lie, Rooster Head. You did, didn't you?" The misture of embaressment and anger of being called rooster, only made him flush more, now turning his cheeks a light shade of scarlet. "Fox, I... Well, yes. I smelled your hair." He stated.  
"Why?" She asked, trying to get a properly answer out of him. "I... Well..." He paused, trying to find the right words. "Fox." He started, but she cut him off. "I have a name! And it's not 'Fox'! It's Megumi! Use it!"

_Should I bring him down  
Should I scream and shout  
Should I speak of love  
Let my feelings out?  
I've never thought I'd come to this  
What's it all about?_

"Have you ever wondered why I call you 'Fox'?" He asked, and she noticed he was still holding her. "Well, of course I have!" She said, rather flustered and angry. "Why do you?"  
"Do what?"  
"Don't play smart with me, Chicken Head! Why do you call me 'Fox'?"  
"It's because I don't want anyone to hear how I utter your name." His voice was low, and his face was nearer hers. "H-How you utter my name?" She said, hoping not to sound nervous. Her face was now flushing pink. He smirked, seeing this. "Yes."  
"H-How do you utter my name?" She asked, trying to pull a little back, now that his face was two inches from hers.  
_"Megumi."_ He murmured, and shivers ran up and down her spine.

_Don't you think it's rather funny  
I should be in this position?  
I'm the one  
Who's always been  
So calm, so cool, no lover's fool  
Running every show  
He scares me so_

He didn't kiss her. She kissed him. Hearing him saying her name was something she couldn't resist. He'd always called her 'Fox', or 'Fox lady' or 'Foxy doctor'. Never Megumi.  
His kiss was something that reassured her. She was certain now, how could she live without him? But yet, the thought scared her. Bonded to one person for your whole life? Could she do that? Did she have enough willpower and strenght to love and stay with _one_ person her whole life? Did he?  
He broke the kiss, looking deep into her eyes. He seemed to be searching for something. But what could he possibly be looking for?  
"Megumi.. Aishiteru, koishii..." Then her heart stopped.

_Should I bring him down  
Should I scream and shout  
Should I speak of love  
Let my feelings out?  
I've never thought I'd come to this  
What's it all about?_

He kissed her again. They fell to the floor. It was like fireworks and still oddly soft. As the kiss grew more passionate, she realized what he had just said... He loved her. He _loved_ her... But did she love him? Was she ready for this? For Sanosuke? She needed time to think things through.  
Before anything else could happen, she broke the kiss and stood up. "Sano, I can't... I'm not ready... I, I have to think..." With that she stormed out, leaving Sano on the floor.  
She sank down outside the clinic, the wall supporting her back. She was frustrated and confused. She heard the door being opened. Nothing happened for a while, then a soft voice spoke.  
"Kirei... So beautiful..." She didn't look up, she could hear him walking back into the clinic, leaving her, something she was grateful for.

_Yet, if he said he loved me  
I'd be lost, I'd be frightened  
I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope  
I'd turn my head, I'd back away  
I wouldn't want to know  
He scares me so  
I love him so!  
I want him so!_

Megumi lifted her gaze to the sky. The rain had stopped and the sky was cloudfree. The stars shone so bright, it was almost painful to look at them. Yet, she kept her head raised. He loved her. She was his beloved. He'd said so himself. Did she love him?  
Her mind went back to the days when Kaoru and Kenshin wasn't married. She had flirted with Kenshin then, mostly to piss Kaoru off, but it had seemed to get to Sanosuke also. Maybe that was why she kept doing it. She had feelings for him even back then. But was it love?  
She knew one thing for sure, the stars couldn't help her. She would only have to jump in the river and see where it brought her. That was what she was going to do.  
Megumi rose and opened the clinic door. Taking a deep breath, she entered and found Sanosuke sitting in front of the fire.  
"Ano..." His head turned. "Aishiteru, Sanosuke.." Seeing his warm eyes, she became certain. She loved him back.

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**A/N:** It's fluffy, it's sappy, it's like every other romance fic on ff.net. Or do you disagree? Tell me, then. And let me know where there's romance fics that's none of the above! I'd like to read one of those!


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